Shortbus chic

I am by no means a fashion icon. I don’t spend more then a hundred dollars on a pair of jeans. I wear clothes that have holes in them, not from a machine or a professional seamstress. I’m talking about real holes that are made from wear, tear, and repeated washes and were not there when I purchased them off the rack.

This doesn’t mean I don’t dress well; I just dress in my own style. I know the difference between what does and does not look good.

This brings me to the point of this week’s rant.

What the fuck is up with trucker hats?

I could go happily through the rest of my life without having to wear one of those again.

People realize they look bad don’t they? We left that style behind for a reason. When I first started wearing hats I had trouble with the mesh back. I hated the way it sat on my head and the snap strip on the back never had the right position for my cranial composition. They sucked.

When cotton hats came out full force with their adjustable leather straps, hat makers and milliners around the world rejoiced as the foam follies were behind us. And then the stars came out. Suddenly Ashton and Justin resurrected the horrific creation and fashion faux pas became a trend. Just because a star wears something, doesn’t make that item better. Remember when Björk wore a dead swan dress to the academy awards? Simply being enveloped in fame doesn’t mean they can dress themselves without help.

Let’s please let some fashions die. Leotards used to be all the rage way back in the day but you don’t see everyone prancing around in hosiery.

If these scant arguments do not move you into agreement try this one; Hats have the perfect shape for mullets… MULLETS!!!

So if you must bring forth any trends from the ashes please think wisely. Don’t enliven a gateway hat for hillbilly hairstyles. Think ease, think style, think of haute couture chic with a hint of nineteen hundred octogenarian relevance. 

Think pleather zipper tie.

One Comment!

  1. AJ

    I’m sorry that you mentioned the leotard- in Australia- it’s back in style. (and so is the mullet and the rattail)… I cringe!

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